The Christian Walk

A Message To Your Aching Heart

I know the pain. You’ve had a dream for so long, and once again it’s starting to slip out of your fingers. You thought it was finally the time to step into that next season. You’ve probably pleaded with God for years to make this dream a reality and your aching heart just can’t deal with seeing it vanish one more time.

How many times have you had that door slam in your face? And you wonder, will it ever open? Will those doors keep slamming? My heart has been broken too many times to count. My hopes have been shattered more than I dare remember. Is there any hope?

I can’t give you an answer, but I can encourage you. If your heart resonates with any of this, then this post is for you.

God Knows and Feels Your Aching Heart

Let me just start by sharing that God knows your pain. Proverbs 13:12 says, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.”

I don’t know what you are going through. Maybe it’s another Christmas spent by yourself. Or it’s a dream job that shut in front of you. Perhaps your significant other just left you, or you just can’t manage to find a significant other in the first place. Or, perhaps, there’s some dream goal you’ve held on to for so long that you felt so close to achieving only to see your chances fall apart.

Whatever it is, God knows.

Not only did he experience this exact same utter heartbreak when mankind first ate from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. He knew just how much this would hurt us, and what this would do to our relationship with him.

Because of his absolute love for us, knowing we would be separated from him for eternity crushed him. I don’t think anything could possibly compare to the pain he felt from that single act.

Not only did God’s heart ache when we ate the fruit, he also felt that pain literally as a human through Jesus when all of humanity rejected him and crucified him.

But, it goes even further than this. God knows your heart. He knows far more than you do about why this thing is causing you pain. More than it hurts you, it hurts him.

Why Does God Allow This Pain?

If God knows how much this heartbreak hurts us, then why allow it? Why not just give us the answer to our pain?

My wife and I got married when I was twenty-seven. For reference, all of my siblings were married by the age of twenty-four. By the age of twenty-five, I had yet to have a single girlfriend.

That’s twenty-five years of longing and hoping and seeing girl after girl not return my affection. There were girls I thought for sure I’d marry and other girls I watched start liking my friends.

I can’t tell you how many times I wondered if I’d spend the rest of my life alone. By the age of twenty-three, I started wondering if something was wrong with me.

I spent hundreds of nights crying into my pillow, and praying to God, “Why, why, why?” Every time I prayed these prayers and turned to God with my aching heart, I felt God weeping beside me.

He didn’t speak audibly to me, but—in some strange way—I felt him say, “I know it hurts, I’m mourning with you too, but trust me. I have a plan. This is the way it has to be.”

I met my wife when I was twenty-four and she was nineteen. I thank God for bringing her into my life all the time. But, could you imagine if I had met her any younger?

If I was twenty-three and she eighteen, I probably wouldn’t have even considered dating her because of her age. Then imagine me being twenty-two (out of college), dating a seventeen-year-old high schooler. God had to make me wait until we were both old enough.

Trust God With Your Aching Heart

I wish I could give you a better answer than this, but it all simply comes down to trust. We must trust God when our hearts break.

Right now I’m wondering when he will ever help me reach this dream I believe he gave me of publishing these fiction books. I’m also wondering what he’s doing with our house-buying situation and why he keeps closing doors on us.

But, God has come through countless times before, and so I must trust that there’s a reason for the pain. David patiently waited thirteen years after being anointed by God as King of Israel to finally become king. Abraham had to wait twenty-five years (from the age of 75 to 100) to finally have that son God promised him.

So yes, turn to God and express your pain. He wants to comfort you, and he’s great at doing so. He is here with you. But don’t get mad at him. There’s a reason why he says this pain is okay because he knows something far better is on its way.

If you follow God’s way, one day you will look back in amazement at all God has done and praise him for working and moving in unfathomable ways. This likely won’t be fame, success, or wealth, but will be a deep rest and satisfaction in your heart that only his presence could bring.

God has his reasons, we simply must trust him.

Trusting God’s perspective and understanding is how we live wilder.

 

If you enjoyed this post, I’d highly encourage you to check out my post: How to be Faithful to God While Playing the Waiting Game

If you are having a hard time trusting God, check out this post: Five Reasons Why You Can Trust God With Your Dreams

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